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The new year [Jan. 11th, 2016|07:26 pm]
Instead of new years resolutions, I decided on a bunch of suggestions to try when I have the time and energy to be bored. I call it my "spare cycle" list (after CPU cycles). If this was tumblr, I'd call it a "spare spoons" list. And I've noticed a theme.

I've decided that for 2016, I want sound and motion.

I've realised that I hid a lot once I got into the working world, and limited myself because of how I felt the world would react to me. In other words, when I got alopecia, it hit a lot more of me than I cared to admit, even when I thought I had accepted the full brunt of it.

So I want to get back to things that helped me feel like me. But possibly with a different spin.

I want sound. I want gigs that pulse through my body and catch me in the beat. It's been a while since I've reddened my thighs by slapping along to the music.

I want to try drumming circles and get lost in the noise, while I try to unpick a rhythmical vein and run with it.

I also want motion.

This is where things might get interesting. There's a bar near work that does various latin styles of dancing. I'm particularly interested in one because it advertises a "sensual" style - it represents a type of motion that's a completely foreign country to me. It represents... well, it represents an attempt to express something vaguely sensual on the dancefloor. My normal type of dancing is "pretentious goth dancing", which we can all agree is devoid of sex.

It would be nice to have a nice yardstick of what's "too much", by way of the rules of a dance.

And now, I find I'm over-thinking the hell out of the whole thing. Even though there are beginners classes listed for both the "vanilla" and "sensual" versions, I feel like there's an obligation to sign up to the "vanilla" version. BUT there are beginner versions of both... so why do I feel it. Probably just me wanting to dodge it on some irrational level.

Then I start thinking about what happens if I start travelling for work. Well, if I miss classes, I miss classes.

Also, the day it's on might conflict with other things (like group). In that case, it's also on another day, so I'll see if it's OK to swap between, or not.

It's an easy thing that I'm overthinking. But I want to learn new things to do with my body.