|Right... Selfish emo moment coming.
||[Nov. 3rd, 2008|12:44 am]
Warning: Time to go into surly teenager mode - despite it being over 6 years too late.
I realise this is a big thing that's happened to me, but I want to state this as clearly as I can: Nothing to see here, move the hell along - YOU DO NOT HAVE OWNERSHIP OF MY APPEARANCE.
Look, I try to make out like the fact that I am without hair is something I can handle gracefully and without large amounts of drama - I'd really like your help on that. Of course, if you're reading this, chances are you already know and understand this point. This is the problem with f-lists, you're really preaching to the choir most of the time. But at any rate, this does include not worrying if you happen to mention getting a haircut and feeling bad that you made the comment in front of me - that's really not a problem for me, and if it ever is, something's very very wrong, and I should be taken out the back yard and shot.
What really bugs me is people proclaiming at length how much they miss it, or wanting to turn it into a big, huge topic of conversation despite me desperately trying to move off the subject. I talk about it when I'm happy to do so, but given that it is, in fact, ME who happens to have the grand sum of 4 hairs on their head, it really is up to me to talk about it.
Why am I like this today? Well, earlier today I was at a Christening for my second cousin. It was generally a nice affair, and there were occasional family comments from those who've not seen me. I kept my replies casual, polite and relatively short. On the other hand, my mum thought to introduce me to the kid's paternal grandmum with "This is <X>. You met him at the wedding, but he had hair down to <points to shoulder> here, but he lost it due to stress of final year." I'm actually struggling to breathe properly right now just as I remember it. Why not throw in the fact that I'm a tranny while you're at it? How about you mention that I tried dealing cannabis incense sticks when I was 12? How about you mention my case of meningitis, that time I had shingles, my asthma and whatever other interesting malady or condition or situation I've been in? Why not disclose my entire life story to someone? Why focus on this one condition, especially as it's not hers? It's not her story to tell. She may be my mother, but she shouldn't be so presumptuous as to think she has that much of a stake in my luxuriant status.
Believe it or not, she actually upset me quite a lot, because it's quite simply disrespectful. The final slap on the head is the fact that, she decides to saunter in and slather my head in moisturiser before she goes to bed. This got my back up as it's something that I can, and do, actually do myself. I'm not an invalid, I'm not physically floored by the fact that I have no hair. Yes, I have my own adjusting to do, but it is something that I have to do. Please, don't tiptoe around it, and don't fucking DARE patronise me about it - I fear it would belie just how little respect you have for me.